Thursday, April 12, 2007

Grumpy and Sleepy and at Least Three Other Dwarfs

It's cold and rainy in NYC today, and I somehow hurt my back a few days back, so I've been nice and extra crispy grumpy lately. I sat down to blog, scanning the papers and websites for an idea, and yet for each topic I came across my first response was a bitter, cynical one. I hate to blog ends up being a crappy post, it turns the readers away, and everyone has enough of that in their lives already, without having to wade through someone else's I figured, I'd find something online to help cheer me up.

I googled a term that I figured would return some good vibes or at least some pleasant distractions. You'll understand in a moment why I don't tell you which term. I clicked on the first link, which was a blog about cute kittens and such, with an author who seemed to have an ideal life based on her profile (smiling picture of a happy housewife who noted she had a fine husband, two kids, fulfilling hobbies, etc.), and I thought, OK, so this is a bit sappy, but keep might do you some good.

I went to scroll down a bit and BOOM ... up came this diabolical pop-up that I couldn't close via the X corner and couldn't get out of the page. I rebooted, rather than click "OK" assuming that would unleash some hellish virus onto my computer. For all I know it already did. I'll be running my virus checking in a moment. Then again, it might have just been a common computer failure of some sort.

But, it doesn't matter. It did the trick. It made me laugh to think some evil bastard might hide a virus within a blog about feeling good.

Other than that, I don't have any ideas on what to blog about today, so I'll turn the keyboard over to y'all...what's on your minds?

Labels: open thread


Blogger James Wolanin said...

How about some casual conversation.

Is anyone going to the Dana Schutz opening tonight?

4/12/2007 09:01:00 AM  
Blogger Edward_ said...

I might if I thought there was any chance of seeing the work. ;-)

I'll pop in some other day. I'm a big fan, I just expect it to be packed.

4/12/2007 09:44:00 AM  
Blogger Mark said...

A little yoga for the back young man.Also will MoMa collapse during the Serra installation?

4/12/2007 09:50:00 AM  
Anonymous bambino said...

It's really awful outside today. So many broken umbreallas everywhere. great project maybe for photographer :)

Why not to blog about our complains?

4/12/2007 10:05:00 AM  
Anonymous markcreegan said...

Heres to Kurt Vonnegut! Thank you sir!

And here is a nice, personal story about Dana Schutz. Some years ago I went to NY for a gig and visited Columbia's MFA program. It was at the end of a semester (like the last day) so no one was around but I found out where the MFA studios were and headed there. As I walked in I saw 3 people, two guys on a computer and a curly headed girl who was headed out the door I was entering. I introduced myself and mentioned I was considering applying. Well, without asking, the girl put down her backpack and enthusiastically showed me around the studios and sat answering questions and offering support for like an hour! It was only later when I saw a picture of her that I realized that was Dana. So I am a big fan too and very happy about her success!

4/12/2007 10:07:00 AM  
Blogger Oly said...

Ed, this link supposedly will make any rainy day sunny.

I have a friend obsessed with that freakin' weird-ass dog, and she claims he brings happiness and joy to the world.



PS-- I counted 21 abandoned/broken umbrellas this AM-- myself included.
Nice idea, Bambino.


PS-- I have little BP sunshine art on my blog today-- nothing says cheer like BIG OIL!

4/12/2007 10:35:00 AM  
Blogger Edward_ said...

Oh, yes, did this cheer me up. The Rape Stopper:

Scumbags of South Africa, you have been warned. Later this month, women there "will be able to arm their vaginas with the Rapex device, a product priced at 1 rand (around 14 cents) and sold over the counter," the Guardian reports. "Shaped like a female condom and worn internally, its hollow interior is lined with 25 razor-sharp teeth, which fasten on to an attacker's penis if he attempts penetration."

The very best part of this story is the inventor's response to charges that the device is mean:

Some people - including women's campaigners - have criticised the device for being "vengeful". Well, as its inventor, Sonette Ehlers, has said, it's "a medieval device for a medieval deed". If any rapist finds himself hopping with pain as a result - as well as facing the fact that the only way to remove the device is said to be a highly awkward and incriminating hospital visit - that seems just fine to me. Yes, it's vengeful. Yes, it hurts rapists. Oh well.

The truly medieval device for the medieval deed can be seen here.

4/12/2007 10:43:00 AM  
Blogger Chris Rywalt said...

The blog conversations I've been working lately have all been downers. Over at Edna's someone told me my paintings are decorative and objectify women; on one Pretty Lady post we're discussing how stupid (or not) cats are and Armageddon; and on Pretty Lady's most recent post, she's become overwhelmed with despair and we're talking about Armageddon some more.

I think I'm going to go out and buy some crickets for my toads. Arthropod Apocalypse!

4/12/2007 10:43:00 AM  
Blogger Carla said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

4/12/2007 10:54:00 AM  
Anonymous David said...

I hate to blog ends up being a crappy post, it turns the readers away...

Unless it's bitter and funny, which changes everything.

EW, you should move your gallery here to L.A. Today it's sunny, in the mid-seventies, with a gentle ocean breeze.

4/12/2007 11:34:00 AM  
Blogger Sunil said...

Loved the rape stopper! Feel better.

4/12/2007 11:38:00 AM  
Anonymous bambino said...

LA sounds good for me but have a car and rive around (which means no alcohol) hmmmmmm, i would think about once again :)

Speaking about umbreallas, it was so many of them, different shapes, different sizes and colors. Some of them laying down by itself or stocked bunch of them all together in the cornet trash can.
Waiting to cross the street on red light, your eyes definetly llok toward those sticking out umbreallas. Its kind of sad though :( Its like people use them once, and wont fix them, its better just through them away

4/12/2007 11:43:00 AM  
Blogger Edward_ said...

I know what you mean about the umbrella's Bambino, they're like the spears or sheilds of fallen warriors on some field, the misty morning after the battle, sad and yet beautiful tokens of a verocious fight against nature. Having lost a few such fights to the elements, I understand the desire to just heave those hapless weapons aside, pathetically not up to the task of protecting you from the wind and rain, leaving you soggy and miffed.

Hmmm...LA is sounding good about now.

4/12/2007 11:50:00 AM  
Anonymous bambino said...

you know me so well ;)

4/12/2007 11:58:00 AM  
Anonymous markcreegan said...

I just heard on NPR that Vonnegut once told a group of artists that their war protests have the power of a bannana cream pie.

So, the following sentence is a discription of a work of art or maybe considered a virtual work in itself.

In an area as near to the Pentagon as possible, a thousand bannana cream pies are arranged on the ground spelling the words "Stop the War". A team of artists (dressed as bannanas?) periodically pick up a pie and throw it at passerby guards or officials or cars. The performance is over once everyone is arrested so I guess it will last about 5 minutes.

4/12/2007 12:15:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Bambino, drinking shouldn't be a problem. You guys will sell a lot of artwork and just take limos everywhere. Don't let your driver drink.

As far as umbrellas, check these out. We got a couple of them, and they're great. Wind-tested to 55 mph.

4/12/2007 12:29:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Go see Godard in L.A at The Billy Wilder Theatre.

Heather Lowe

4/12/2007 12:54:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

About your back:

Listen, wear rubber soled shoes as much as you can and everytime you can get away with it.

Fashion is killing our feet and back with leather soles and all leather shoes.

We are making our back and feet vulnerable and weak by walking all they long without any cushioning.


...The Hermitage....

4/12/2007 01:03:00 PM  
Anonymous Noddy Turnell said...

I'll take NY rain, snow, ash, pigeon shit, sad umbrellas, and all.

don't make me drive please please please

4/12/2007 04:32:00 PM  
Blogger Tim said...

No rain here in LA but we are having the winds from Hell. Dust coming over the hills. Pretty weird. Car alarms going off . . . Could this be it?

It's been fun.

4/12/2007 04:52:00 PM  
Blogger fisher6000 said...

Kurt Vonnegut's dead, the outer burroughs are flooded, dust winds from hell plague Los Angeles...

...what apocalypse?

Seriously, Edward, about your back. I know this is like telling someone to smile, but there is real proof that being angry and crabby makes your back hurt more. Take it from someone who has The Instant Back Karma... the instant I lose my temper, I also lose my ability to stand up straight.

Make Bambino rent you a funny movie.

4/12/2007 05:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...all day long....


4/12/2007 05:07:00 PM  
Anonymous bambino said...

He is addicted now to Sopranos, but still doesnt help :P

Back to umbrellas, counted 12 of them on the street in 2 Manhattan blocks during my lunch break. Without counting other in trash cans on 4 corners of the street.
Sad sad umbrellas......

4/12/2007 05:19:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Oh man, there's nothing like The Sopranos to relive stress. Bambino, try to get Edward to watch Entourage instead. And pick up one of those Gustbuster umbrellas. Really. Windtested to 55 mph. I keep one in my car on the off chance it ever rains here.

4/12/2007 05:50:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

nothing like The Sopranos to relive stress

Ha! I meant to type "relieve" stress, but "relive" is probably more accurate. I'd hate to be Tony's brother-in-law right now.

4/12/2007 05:53:00 PM  
Blogger Concrete Phone said...

you can't stop the spring. It's built in.

4/12/2007 07:09:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you going to be around at the Art Show in Chicago every day when the art show is going on?

I might come down just to see if my impressions of a blogger match with the real person, if I can convince my wife to go.

Best Regards,
Obsidian Wings commenter

Listen to my son's 10yr old childrens choir songs at Taking it Outside, formerly "Hating on Charles Bird.

4/13/2007 01:06:00 AM  
Blogger Edward_ said...

Hey DaveC,

Yes, I'll be there all day every day. Please do stop in and say hi.

All the best,

4/13/2007 03:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

f*** c rywalt the blowharder

4/14/2007 05:16:00 PM  
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