Thursday, September 28, 2006

While We're Away

OK, so I'm leaving the country in your hands (Bambino and I head out this afternoon). While we're gone, don't think it's non-stop-party time, though. Below is a "to do" list of five things we expect to be completed by time we get back. You're all adults (well, most of you), so I'm sure you can work out amongst yourselves who's best suited to do what, but we'll be checking in (as best we can) during our journeys, so don't leave it all to the last minute.

Here, in no particular order, are the things we'd like to see upon returning to the US:
  1. Maintain a healthy national respect for habeas corpus, for all human beings, no matter what. I know that Lincoln suspended it during the Civil War, but let me make this easy for you...Bush is NO Lincoln and he never will be, so stop suggesting that makes it OK. This means, defeat the CYA detainee treatment bill Bush is muscling through the Congress to ensure he can't be tried for war crimes. (EXTRA: If you find the time, try Bush for war crimes).
  2. Get the ambitious "Christian" leaders who attended the Family Research Council/Focus on the Family/American Family Association "Values Voters" summit to come up with a "rally the base" message that doesn't hinge upon fear, hatred, or intolerance. You know, help them pick an issue that Christ would approve of.
  3. Give each Democrat serving in Congress a spine implant. And a few could use a personality implant while you're at it.
  4. Car pool, buy a hybrid, take the bus now and then...Do what you personally can to lessen the pollutants contributing to the greenhouse effect. At least do more than you're doing right now. If that's just not your thing, consider instead buying some new ocean-front property. I hear good deals are to be had in Ohio.
  5. Don't be afraid. No matter how high they raise the terror alert, and even if (God forbid) terrorists do strike...buck up, handle it like adults, and look out for each other. (I'll repeat that one because if I come back and hear any of you forgot this one, there will be hear me???) LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER. And most importantly, keep our civil liberties intact. Fight for them tooth and nail. In the end, as a nation, they are our greatest treasure. Lose them, and the rest doesn't matter anywhere near as much.

OK, that's it. Do these right and we'll bring you all back some juicy sheep eyeballs as a pressie. See you soon!

e_ & b

PS. Image above of Tash Rabat, ancient inn on the Silk Road, about an hour outside the Kyrgyz / China border. We'll be visiting (but not's a national monument now). I'm so excited!!!


Blogger Tyler said...

Say hi to Borat for me.

9/28/2006 09:25:00 AM  
Blogger ondine-nyc said...

Bon Voyage boyz!

Can't wait to hear all about it.

It would be so nice to get away from all this pathetic Bushco stuff (and now the Dems give him a torture victory? just what would it take for them to filibuster something???) but i doubt you can escape it anywhere these days as this 2-legged nightmare is the leader of the free world. Give it a try though!

9/28/2006 10:08:00 AM  
Blogger Candy Minx said...

Have a great trip! We'll miss you, but looking forward ot photos.

I am having an art opening , if you don't have time to drop by, send some of your friends.

Everyone is welcome, stop in and have a glass of wine, some brandy-poached figs stuffed with gorgonzola and roasted pecans.

Here is the address:

9/28/2006 11:26:00 AM  
Blogger Lisa Hunter said...

Have a wonderful trip. We'll try to make sure you don't return to a land where all the nude statues are covered with fig leaves and drapery.

9/28/2006 11:31:00 AM  
Anonymous David said...

EW and Bambino, have a great trip!

As far as your to-do list, it's certainly all stuff that our smart and capable group can accomplish, but it could take awhile. How long are you going to be gone?

9/28/2006 11:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Dan Savage,

I think I may have inadvertently been having sex with a republican. I feel awful. But the sex was good. Do I have to stop now that I suspect the truth?

Tainted Nooky

9/28/2006 12:16:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Tainted Nooky,

Good sex is good sex, and good sex with a bad person is usually better sex (not that all Republicans are bad, mind you), but you should really try to use your sexual encounters to teach your Republican the way to truth. Perhaps wispering in his/her ear just before they climax "This is how it feels when the Dems take over Congress." or something subtle like that. :-)

---(Surogate) Dan Savage

9/28/2006 12:21:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank you wise one. I feel so dirty and I like it!


9/28/2006 12:25:00 PM  
Blogger kurt said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9/28/2006 04:16:00 PM  
Anonymous Cedric Caspesyan said...

Hey, no way..I'm not doing boring duty stuff while you are away having fun.

But please don't go and wave "GAY!"
at every corners of Kyrgyzstan, I might be misinformed but...

is a bit crude a name for a site on gay rights worldwide).

Stil, homosexuality is legal in kyrgyzstan since 1998.


Cedric Caspesyan

9/28/2006 04:23:00 PM  
Blogger rb said...

happy trails, guys!

I'll be in London in a couple of weeks so perhaps I'll see you at Year 06....

9/28/2006 06:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Go boys, go....and celebrate your freedom over there...well deserved. You got rid of deadweight and now you will prosper... .

Take a lots of pictures.

9/28/2006 07:50:00 PM  
Anonymous jec said...

I hope you're having a great time.

Are you on media blackout? If so, you'll be interested to hear all the stuff going on here when you next catch CNN. Looks like we'll pick up another Republican Congressman's seat (FL-16).

10/03/2006 08:10:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Since we're on our own for awhile, anyone want to suggest a topic? Maybe make an outrageous statement or something that we can argue (nicely) about?

10/05/2006 07:42:00 PM  

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