Thursday, August 31, 2006

Mock Movement Marathon: Step 3: The Rules (or lack thereof)

Casualism Wins!

That's cool, I guess. :-)

Here are the returns:
  • Casualism = 14 pts.
  • Post-Allism = 9 pts.
  • Fundaminimalism = 9 pts.
  • Wannabeism = 2 pts.
  • Sizzlemyshizelism = 1 (sympathy) pt.
Which is good because onesock has drafted an awesome list of preliminary rules (see below) to form the bulk of the manifesto (or womanifesto, if you will). But do join in and suggest some more, if you'd like. No pressure, dudes/dudettes.

Also good, the Artist Extraordinare drafted a Mission Statement:
It's all good, relax, it will all work out. If you call it art, cool, it's art.
But, like, this is a democratic movement--- all opinions/suggestions are welcome--- so do feel free to join in. Here's onesock's awesome start to the rules:
  1. Hey dudes*, whatever.
  2. Hey check it out, no blanket statements from us! Unless its cold outside of course.
  3. Art is sooooo awesome! I once knew a guy who glued some tortillas to a canvas and discovered that the rats ate them off during the night so he glued some more so they could have some more...AWeSoME!
  4. ARt is KNEE-Toe!! get it? our sister does ab-ex, our bro does post-concept, I do neo-geo, my mama does dada! Awesome!
  5. Smell your kneaded eraser sometime, its AWesOmE!
  6. HEy, anyone wanna start a kickball team?
  7. Okay so check it out, the forest has Smokey the Bear right? well, we got that gut on Sesame STreet who would sneakup on people an paint letters on their sandwiches and stuff (or was it the Electric Co.? we cant remember)
  8. A lot of our art is inspired by a trip we all took somewhere. We admired the people there. They were Awesome!
  9. Comrades, we tell you now that the triumphant progress of science makes profound changes in humanity inevitable, changes which are hacking an abyss between those docile slaves of past tradition and us free moderns, who are confident in the radiant splendor of our future....yeah right, WHATEVER!!!
* (instead of comrades)

Others?

23 Comments:

Anonymous bnon said...

The Casualist Manifesto

I saw a bird today. We got together and talked about stuff. It's no big deal, but I want to tell you about our new movement, casualism. Or you can call us The Casuals. Or the Kaz. Really, though, we don't call it anything in particular. The bird was flying in the air. What a trip! It was cool. But you might not not have liked it. Here. Sit down. Take a toke. That's better. Munchies? Hang on a sec. I've got to toss some paint on that thing. Okay. Want a beer? So, like that bird? The Kaz want to be more like that bird. Crap! Just push the dog aside. He won't bite. Anyhoo, the Kaz want to be like that bird. We want to fly where we want, and when we're sick of it we just want to blow it off. Say we want to paint today. We go ahead and do it! If not, no way. We like to read Barthes, sure. Down! Jesus, down! Atta boy, Jesus. Jesus gets excited when he sees visitors wearing loafers and a tie. Anyway, we like Barthes, but we can never quite figure out if we like Structuralism or Post-Structuralism better. Do you smell something burning? Let me go turn that off. Okay. So. We're pretty sure we like abstraction, and we're just about positive we like figuration. We're enthusiastic about conceptualism. Yeah, maybe we like that the best. So this bird sets himself down on this pole. He looks at us, the guys in our group. He looks us right in the eye. You know how fierce a bird can look if you look him straight in the eye? Pretty fierce, we can tell you. Just a sec, I gotta take this call. Okay. Back. He's glaring at us. The next thing we hear is this huge squawk. We're not quacks or kooks, but we could swear the bird just shouted F**K IT! at the top of its lungs, if birds have lungs and not just air vents or something. Anyway, that's our manifesto. Hey, have you seen my wallet?

8/31/2006 10:07:00 AM  
Anonymous Eric said...

Dude, I'm a real artist -- I went to Burning Man! It ROCKED! My eyes are now opened.

8/31/2006 10:42:00 AM  
Anonymous David said...

Casualism!

Here's my suggestion for a pared-down (wo)manifesto:

1. Awesome!
2. Cool!
3. If you say so
4. Whatever
5. Later

8/31/2006 11:31:00 AM  
Blogger Jackmormon said...

Casualism's critique of other movements:

It just looks like it's trying too hard, you know?

8/31/2006 12:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Henry said...

Ideology is like so 20th century. This century is all about the bling. Manifestos are out. We need a moneyfesto instead.

8/31/2006 12:48:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

moneyfesto

Absolutely! I second that, or whatever..

8/31/2006 03:08:00 PM  
Anonymous Nicolai said...

moneyfesto, AWesomE!

8/31/2006 03:35:00 PM  
Blogger Tim said...

shrug

8/31/2006 03:50:00 PM  
Anonymous ml said...

Sweet.

8/31/2006 04:02:00 PM  
Blogger Tim said...

We need more "Like, whatever, dude" in the world.

The Casuals are on to something.

8/31/2006 04:16:00 PM  
Blogger Tim said...

The Main Moneyfesto of the Totally Awesome Casuals!!

Like, whatever, dude.

What you do, that's cool. If I dig it, awesome. If I don't, no biggy. Long as your not hurtin nobody or being an a-hole I'm OK with it. I hope you see it the same.

8/31/2006 04:24:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Do art movements have passwords, like secret societies do? Whatever, I think ours should.

So if you're walking along in, like, Chelsea (or Culver City) and you see someone you think might be a fellow Casualist, just walk up to them and say "Show me the Moneyfesto." If they answer "Like, whatever, dude," go have a beer together. But if they yell for the police, run!

8/31/2006 04:40:00 PM  
Blogger onesock said...

I hereby repudiate all of Casualism and purge myself from any association with said movement. I do retain the right to have my name associated with casualism if and when it benefits my career (moneyfesto indeed!)however.

(i figure a mock movement deserves a mock originator mock disbanning himself early on!)

8/31/2006 06:06:00 PM  
Anonymous William said...

Clearly, the holy grail of Casualism would have to The Big Lebowski.

"Haven't you ever considered...like hey man, you aren't privy to all the new shit that's come to light."


"Take it easy, I've got a beverage here, man"

"That's far out man. That's really fucking far out."

-The Dude, the grandfather of Casualism. Noted lover of feminism, performance art,interpretive dance, Credence, white russians, pot,and of course, bowling.

8/31/2006 09:07:00 PM  
Blogger John Morris said...

Oh My god, what did I vote for? I repudiate this movement completly and am moving back to my core belief in Sothebychrisianity.

One fundamental aspect of our creed is that movement's are important if they do well at auction.

8/31/2006 09:44:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

At the rate people are leaving, Casualism may be the shortest-lived movement in history. But hey, whatever. We should make some shirts though.

8/31/2006 09:59:00 PM  
Blogger John Morris said...

If they sell well, I might go back. A good Sothebychristiean is flexable in his worship of almighty um art.

Were any casualist works made that I could sell, or are we just gonna have beer stained shirts?

8/31/2006 10:56:00 PM  
Anonymous Cedric Caspesyan said...

This movement moved so fast that it walked all over me (that's what happens when spend time in Ohio).

I feel like being the first victim of art casualty. But am I?

I'm interested in a movement that scrutinize the casualties of the artworld and its victims.


Cedric Caspesyan

9/01/2006 01:31:00 PM  
Blogger onesock said...

I'm interested in a movement that scrutinize the casualties of the artworld and its victims.

This is interesting to me also. I always thought what a hoot it would be to create a very thorough alternative art history text that completely ignores the same old same olds. It would be researched by mining the old art magazines for names of artists that had a review say in the 70s and disappeared. Obscure names like Les Levine, Liliane Lijn, Takis, Philip KIng, Stanley Landsman.

No I am not a repository of obscure art names I got these from an old text called "Late Modern: The Visual Arts Since 1945" by Edward Lucie-Smith. Except I knew Les Levine who is aWesOme.

9/01/2006 04:59:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

One-hit-wonderism!

9/01/2006 05:40:00 PM  
Anonymous Henry said...

onesock - I googled those names. Stanley Landsman died in 1984 at the age of 54, and Les Levine seems to have dried up after a short but influential span, but the rest are in fact thriving. Fame might not be a very meaningful indicator of success. Takis; Phillip King; Liliane Lijn.

9/01/2006 06:45:00 PM  
Anonymous David said...

Hey everyone, have a great holiday weekend. I sure enjoyed the meteoric rise and scandalous implosion of our art movement. See you all in the fall art season!

9/01/2006 07:27:00 PM  
Blogger rb said...

hmmn, my Lucie-Smith falls open to Yves Klein in an I-Chingie way, so the next wave must be nEo-dA-caSuaLism

9/02/2006 06:08:00 PM  

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